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Murdoch To Be In Charge of E-voting From 2020

Rupert Murdoch’s business empire is due to design, build and run the software for digital voting at the next election.

Rupert Murdoch’s British telecommunications company Sky UK Limited is apparently holding secret talks with the newly elected Conservative Party about plans to fully digitise the UK voting process in time for the 2020 General Election.Our source describes the discussions as “well advanced”.

skyVOTE

Twelve million current SKY customers – around a fifth of the population – would automatically receive the “already finished” skyVOTE app downloaded to their phones, TVs, and other devices. Non-Sky customers would be encouraged to download the free app to allow them to vote – in what is described as “a cutting edge, state of the art voting system for a modern democracy”.

Lord Ashcroft’s internet-based market research firm YouGov has apparently also submitted a proposal to offer app-based voting facilities for the government, but our source believes Sky’s formidable infrastructure and customer base is the preferred option.


Incentives to vote using skyVOTE will include discounts on Sky products and services. Savings to the taxpayer are said to be “very large”, almost halving the current cost of £125m for the administration of the 2015 General Election. Benefits are said to include:
  1. Quicker counting
  2. Increased security (the entire voting system will be housed on Sky’s impressive internal hardware infrastructure
  3. Increased voter turnout (no more voting in person, no more postal votes).
The proposals – whilst sweeping and revolutionary – appear to have the backing of all parties and must be greenlit before Christmas 2015 to have a chance of being legally implemented in line with the Parliamentary procedure for the 2020 General Election.



UPDATE: WARNING THIS IS SATIRE 
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